Tree Climbing With a Skirt

These beautiful spring days are no time for restricting pants. Skirts are needed for body celebration to jump and play in the mud and to lick the rain off flowers. But then again it is also time for tree exploration, examining the noks and crannys of our beautiful forest. What to do??? hmmmmmmmm well you might be able to figure it out with some trial and error. but ill share a tested method with you all. What you will need: A skirt, some feet, some hands, an elbow or two works well, shoes and shirts optional (shoes not recommended), a tree!, some rain if you like.

Hopefully this will not be too difficult for you, if it is I am sorry. The trees, they cant hide very easily so if you are anywhere near you will probably be aware. Essentially any tree can be climbed but for our adventure I recommend choosing a tree with many sturdy branches that start as low down as possible. The fewer the branches and the further the spacing the more difficult, choose an appropriate tree for your climbing skills. Also make sure the tree looks healthy and able to support your weight, decaying dead trees can be kinda sketchy.

You are going to need your hands for this first one. Get a grip on whatever you can reach, whether it be a branch, a large chunk of bark or whatever the tree lends to you. For each movement test the strength of what you are about to transfer your weight to BEFORE putting your whole weight down.

This is where the bare feet come in handy. Wedge your toes in somewhere if you cannot get a reliable foot grip quite yet. This is much easier if the bark is thick and jagged. If your feet can find a branch place foot on branch and hoist yourself up, putting you in a position to grap the next highest branch.

So now use arms, legs, hands, toes, and various other body parts to lift yourself fully into the tree and off the ground. Taking care to not reach too far and have your skirt fall off.

Shift your weight from branch to branch using arms, legs, etc.. Hooking your legs around branches can give you more stability and help you keep your skirt together.

When there are no more branches to reach up to, pull yourself up by your arms and get your feet as close to your arms as possible. You will push up with your legs so you can scoot your bottom onto a comfy resting place.

If you are ready to stop or you have reached the top, make sure your seat is steady and enjoy the great view!

Get a good grip with your hands on something or other and then find a place to put your feet. Like on the way up transfer weight from branch to branch. Going down should be easier because you will have mapped out a good route on the way up. Remember to make sure your footing/grip is steady before you transfer your weight.

Dont forget to keep your eyes peeled for interesting forest creatures when you are in the trees. This is a bug who i think is shedding his shell that I found on the way down. Pretty cool :)