Plumbing Piracy

Long ago, I met a Pastor whom had some code violation issues with the local municipal figure that be (me Mum). Myself, of fine moral character and belief of proper sanitary conditions for all, found a fence riding friend whom provides for a multitude of the messed up general public that includes a colorful cast of characters such as a clown like myself.

On this adventure, Pastor Ben has gained use of a 52,000 sq ft facility that has 36 different medical suites. Its very big with over 120 different rooms, a courtyard in the center, fun all day BUT full of scares at night, and endless work for a guy trying to get a grip on a life that just keeps swimming on past me.

So, my first duty was to get a working shower up and running. There are 2 water meters to the property but only one is on and the other is locked off by the water company.

Having 2 water meters, the building is basically cut in half in terms of domestic water use. My thought was to jump the two systems together, with the use of a common garden hose, to gain immediate use of a well needed shower.

I found an old broken handled hose bib on the patio. It was in rough shape and I had to clean the calcium off the threads to even get the garden hose on BUT, with a deep love of brass and diligent work with a file, a new chapter of life began for this old forgotten spigot.

Not being here for very long, it took some time to find the hose bib thread I needed to make the necessary connection for my intended use with only the materials on hand.

After a search, I found this old mop sink. Using a washing machine hose, I was able to reverse the hose bib thread from male to female, making a connection from one metered water system to the other, in order to gain a working shower for the skeleton crews necessary hygienic needs.

OK? The water was on, the system appeared to be filling, BUT it never filled, AND that hose never stopped flowing. After much legwork and turning of valves to isolate each part of the system I found the issue.

Why was the meter locked off? (of course you asked!) That grimy old mop sink gave way to feeding a slab leak underground. It would appear that the water bill ran up so large and so unpaid, the municipal water company was kind enough to turn it off for a uncaring realtor just wanting to dump a property.

Meanwhile, I still need to take a shower and Jesus hates a quitter, so I take to combing the building for the parts and location needed to complete my needs for a symphony of aquatic poetry of a shower in action.

First, my extensive search revealed a ball valve with hose bib thread on one end, about 10' of 3/8" copper tubing on the other end, BUT I worked up a horrible thirst.

Then, I went to the closest 3/8" compression fitting to the hose bib I could find and found a cache of liquor. After securing my liquid booty, I completed my water system of ill connection, and showered under a lite rainfall of the finest illegal water droplets ever bestowed upon my body.

We all sat down and had another taco feast that just couldn't be beat!